10 Everyday Things I’m Grateful For in 2025

Hello everyone, and welcome to another exciting edition of “everyday things I am grateful for!” For those of you that don’t know what I am talking about, every year I have made it a tradition for Thanksgiving to write about 10 things I am grateful for that have no reference to any decor you would find in Hobby Lobby. You know what I am talking about; peace, love, joy, family, friends, happiness, and “don’t forget to flush.” Those are all important of course, but there are so many more things that Hobby Lobby does not recognize. I advise you to go back to my previous editions to help you realize what you don’t miss until it is gone. Sit back, put your glasses on, if you are sitting on the toilet (as most do nowadays) take your last wipe and enjoy reading about the 10 things (perhaps stupid things) that I am grateful for this year.

1. Roundabouts

I am aware that there are mixed feelings about this one, but in Woodbury, MN, which seems to be the land of roundabouts, I have learned just how great they are. On the other hand, some towns that haven’t had any updates since the flip phone, are the land of stop signs. I’m going to be a Karen here, but the whole start – stop deal is really annoying when they are every half mile, especially when you are the only one at the 4 way stop. There have been many times I have wanted to run the stop sign, but have resorted to the rolling stop method, and let’s be honest that you are guilty of that, too. With roundabouts, it is the legal equivalent of running a stop sign. Not to mention, my Rav 4 temporarily turns into a race car going around the smooth curve and revs back up going on my merry way down the road again. No herky jerky or car sickness involved. For those who have no clue how roundabouts work, or are perfectly fine wasting gas on the stopping and starting at stop signs, I suggest you get up to speed with the upgrade of the road.

2. Baby Aspirin

I told myself I was going to try to keep mom related things out of this. Well, this is not mom related still. For those who read my latest posts, you learned that I was in a traumatic bike accident which made my vertebral artery decide to tear. How rude! Because of this, I was on blood thinners for a year. I have to admit, since my Epilepsy medications never are in the limelight; I got excited every time the cheesy commercial for my blood thinner came on of old people living their joyous lives licking an ice cream cone or smiling doing water aerobics while on the blood thinner. I also felt special that I was the only one in my family that could make conversation with my grandparents talking about our blood thinners. Anyways, I have now transitioned to indefinitely taking a chewable baby aspirin every morning to make sure I prevent a stroke. I really don’t mind because the orange flavor tastes pretty good, kind of like the Flintstone orange vitamin I took every morning! I am grateful for this because on Eliquis, I bruised so easily that I had bruises on my legs/arms/stomach/you name it, making it look like every part of my body accidentally slammed into the corner of a table while walking by…although that’s common for me. Now, I get regular bruises from regular bruise inducing things such as wiping out trying to run after my toddler. Now that I finish this paragraph, I’m not quite sure this is an everyday thing, whoops!

3. Brooms

Important enough to make the picture!

Ok, so I am kind of breaking my vow not to talk about mom stuff here, but all people can use a broom, and needs to give them some love for their job. This is similar to the toilet brush point I made last year. As I was trying to reflect on what I am grateful for this year, I asked myself “what are my daily pain points?” One problem came to my mind real quick, and it is the one-sided food fights my son has with the floor every day (we are working on it.) I imagined what it would look like if I didn’t have a broom, and the image that came into my head was being hunched on the floor picking up every cheerio manually, swiping up dried ground turkey with the sleeve of my favorite sweatshirt real quick, or making the Bounty paper towel commercials come to life. I could list a lot more things, but I’ll put it this way; if the floor had a mouth, it would be very full, and I would spend half the day on the floor trying to pick up Teddy Grahams. I understand the concept of toddler exploration and expression of emotions; but why couldn’t it be in the form of setting it down on his plate, making a 3 point shot into the trash can, or hovering out of his high chair and flying it back into the fridge to save for later? I used to put my broom in the closet after I used it occasionally, but now I don’t even bother because my broom has become my ballroom dance partner as we glide across the floor and under the table with long sweeps of said ground turkey, sticky peanut butter sandwiches, crushed chocolate bunny crackers, waffle, or really any toddler food that you made them with love…but it ends up smooshed on the floor just like your heart is now broken on the floor, too. Thank your broom today, or in advance, because at some point, the fact the Vikings can sweep their opponent doesn’t mean they can sweep Spaghetti-Os off your floor.

4. Printed Pictures

Call me old fashion but I like to make my many pictures on my phone come to life. Having your pictures backed up to iCloud isn’t the only way to keep your memories safe (ok, they would survive a flood or your house burning down, but give me my shining moment here.) A lot of people love to make Shutterfly books of their pictures, and those are great, but that is not the same as the kind of printed photos that I love! You can’t take those out, move them around, give a picture to someone, or write on it…well you could, but that would require some scissors. Since Casey was born, I started a picture book with all of the memorable pictures and people that he will be able to see someday. Additionally, I have written something on the back of every picture whether that be a date, who someone is, what milestones he has achieved, but most importantly, some witty joke or cheesy remark that will probably embarrass him someday.

You can give someone your phone to look through pictures, but then you have to awkwardly stand there watching them, praying that a text notification doesn’t come through that is about something you really don’t want someone to read from your spouse or gossip from the friend group text. I also love that I can send pictures in the mail to a grandparent or parent that ultimately ends up framed in their house or on the fridge (thanks Mom and Gram!) Something about taking the time and effort to drive ALL the way to Walgreens, put those pictures in Casey’s photo book, or the pictures of Zach and I on the fridge, is a rewarding feeling for me. It is so different than scrolling through my phone which most pictures I will have forgotten and never look at again due to the fact they are a tiny square at the top of my camera roll. Lastly, I am 100% sure the guy at Walgreens knows my life story now, as he has seen Casey’s prints from the day he was born! How do I know this? He always says “you’re the girl with the baby, right?”

5. Air Conditioning

Every year I seem to have a “you don’t know what you have until it’s gone” moment. A previous one in years past was underwear. I now appreciate underwear more than you know after forgetting any/all on my honeymoon which was on an island that did not sell any. You really get creative, I will let your mind go wherever it leads you with that. This year is AC. This may seem boring, but when you go a month without it due to your house getting struck by lightning, that makes it a little less boring, right? Because of this method of losing it, there was not a quick fix. There really is a way to stump the HVAC guy! This also happened to be during the hottest time of the year. I turned into someone that sleeps on the top of the sheets which just feels downright wrong, and Casey slept in only a diaper which also felt wrong. The upside? I got to make the joke to my co-workers that I was working so hard that day that I was sweating! So, I advise everyone to think a little more about your air conditioning today, or maybe even give it a name, because it truly is amazing and is a luxury when getting in a hot car and you’re able to make the feeling of sitting in a sauna away.

6. Mentors

A mentor can stem from and mean a lot of things! A mentor at work, a mentor in finances, a mentor at the gym, a mentor in mental health, or even a mentor on making the perfect Blackstone burger. For me? I have found my mentors in previous managers of mine. I don’t know if that sounds odd or not, but now that they are not my managers, I feel a lot more freedom to discuss work related topics. For example, I now have been able to say “hey, remember when you asked me to do this? Yeah, I had no clue how to do that but was not about to admit that to you as your direct report.” Or, “hey, you used to scare the crap out of me sometimes!” I now consider these individuals friends, as I talk to them daily ranging from professional advice, financial topics, advice on how to get your kid to eat anything but cheez its…to sending gifs every morning, keeping up on Facebook, occasionally calling to catch up on life, venting to each other, and now, making the Christmas card list! These people in my life have become so important to me. I am grateful for the fact that being a manager to me; they know me in a lot of different ways, even more than some of my friends do, which make Co-workers and people that have broader experience such great mentors. I wish I had the exact words to portray the feeling of gratitude I have! Think about your mentor right now and go tell them you are grateful for where they have gotten you!

7. Stationary Bikes

This year I have used my spin bike so much! It is so convenient to have it in my home gym, aka my storage closet that is just big enough to argue it is not a closet but instead, a tiny room. (I am surrounded by retired baby equipment, but I am still standing behind my argument.) I can go hop on it while Casey is napping, do the opposite of what he is doing, and then feel so great afterwards knowing that I don’t have to commute farther than walking down the stairs. My bike also survived the lightning strike (I really am going to refer to that a lot because it was that bad.) While the computer part of the bike containing the virtual Peloton-like workouts on the screen died, the bike itself did not…this kind of goes back to printed pictures in a way; some things are just better when they aren’t electronic. I won’t say much more about this topic, but I will end with the fact that it is a way to exercise while sitting down, too!

8. Playgrounds

I can’t tell you the last time I played on a playground. Oh wait, yes I can, last week. I’ve told people that one of the best things about having a kid, is that part of you gets to become a kid again. Going to the park with Casey is a socially acceptable way for me to run around going down slides, doing monkey bars, and going on swings just like I did when I was in elementary school. Some things don’t change even when becoming an adult (or maybe this means I am not an adult yet.) I am grateful for parks because they are a great outlet for a toddler that likes to run around the house and climb tables. In addition, as a parent, it can get really hard trying to figure out what to do with your child that isn’t the same thing over and over again after dinner. In our house, it is take everything out of the cabinets in the kitchen, run around the house with usually a bucket or potholder, drag them up the stairs, and hide them somewhere that I will not find until a later date. Little boys have so much energy, and I do not, so a playground is the perfect way to channel their energy while I can sit back and watch him almost go head first down a slide until I call out to turn around (he actually does turn around, he’s a good boy!) Lastly, playgrounds nowadays have gotten a huge glow up and have so many cool contraptions and activities! Zach and I love to discover new playgrounds to take him to. Instead of looking up restaurant reviews like most people do our age, we are critiquing the components of new playgrounds!

9. Bluey

Before having a kid, I heard all the hype about this show called “Bluey” and thought it was so overrated. Now? I have a sincere connection with Bluey’s whole family. I can tell you her whole family tree including her sister Bingo, cousin Muffin, Dad Bandit, Mom Chili, and all Bluey’s friends. I love going down the Bluey aisle at Target just as much as Casey now. I am also grateful for Bluey because this show keeps Casey entertained when I need it, such as on a 3 hour plane ride to Texas (thank goodness.) There is so much talk about keeping kids away from screens and being “screen kids,” but I fully believe that sometimes, it just needs to happen, and there is nothing wrong with it! The 7 minute episodes (another version of 7 minutes in heaven,) give me a little bit of time to clean up the dishes from dinner, comforts when they are sick, reply to an email, I can fold a load of laundry, or simply, have a break! In order for me to parent at my best, I need to take a little time for me to just decompress for a bit. I can’t believe how much scrutiny is out there, and telling another parent that your kid watches TV sometimes feels like you are telling them that you just backed into their car, aka, embarrassed, nervous, and ashamed. I grew up watching my cartoons that I loved, and they brought me so much joy and memories, and I think I turned out ok! Anyone remember Dragon Tales or Blues Clues? (Maybe Blue is Bluey’s ancestor.) Lastly, Bluey is an Australian show, who doesn’t love an Australian accent?

10. Street Tacos

Nothing lengthy here, I am just grateful they exist as they bring me what Hobby Lobby would say: “joy, love, happiness.” To be specific, the street tacos from Centro. Do I have a street taco ranking list on my phone? You betcha.

Full disclaimer: I am starting to get tired of typing, and don’t want to use my brain anymore as it is transitioning to thinking about sweet potato casserole instead. For those of you still on the toilet, I’m almost done and you should have been a long time ago.

Well there goes another year’s list of everyday things that need a little more attention. I mention every year that I have a daily gratitude practice of writing down 3 everyday things I am grateful for. Today’s were snow boots, large coffee mugs, and placemats. Weird? Maybe. True? I think so. We can get so wrapped up in the never ending roundabouts of daily life that we forget the little things (see what I did there?) The psychology of gratitude is so prevalent when looking at mental health, and finding joy in the little things is a muscle that everyone should start training. Lastly, I am grateful that I had the time to write this blog!

Happy Turkey Day, folks!

~Lauren

10 Awkward Mom Moments

When I became a mom, I envisioned having this super close-knit squad right away as if a new baby was a magnet. Well, I am here to tell you that as a 25 year old with a newborn living in the suburbs, finding a mom group was hard! My friends were in a totally different stage of life. I also was not in the part of the city that gave me a pre-made Hello Fresh type of social life where I’d meet and see people regularly. Instead, I needed to go scavenge for my own food of a social life. Extending yourself can be awkward, but that is what it took for me to find the group I can relate to. This leads me to the inspiration of this post. I am a part of an international organization called MomCo. Our “squad” chapter meets twice a month to just chill and do activities that grow our faith, motivation, and refill our cups a bit. Think sorority, but Mom edition (we pay dues, sorority language unlocked from college.) This year’s theme is Make it Awkward. For those of you that know me, this is not a hard task, as I willingly embarrass myself often and embrace it. Making it awkward in this context means vulnerability. Have you ever thought of it that way? Awkward situations can lead to deeper relationships because it allows for people to help you, relate, humble you, and clear the air when it needs to be. So now, I present to you, 10 awkward or “interesting” moments I have run into as a fresh mom so far.

1. Shop and Run

I am getting a lot better at grocery shopping with a baby now turned toddler. I actually enjoy it because I don’t have to worry about the awkwardness of trying to get past someone in the aisle as they intensely inspect the nutrition label of Fruity Pebbles versus Cookie Crunch; he gets the attention not me (phew.) I also enjoy watching him as he is so fascinated by all the things we zoom by. I wish aisles of vegetables gave me that much joy as they do him.

When I go grocery shopping nowadays, I have two concerns. The first is being embarrassed by the self-checkout machine when it locks up and lets the whole store know that I didn’t put something in the bagging area when I clearly did. The second is loading groceries without realizing Casey is rolling away in a cart down the parking lot. Because of this, I strap him in the car first then put the cart in the cart corral. But this particular time was different. We were ready to go home to continue our Saturday consisting of nothing. I was halfway home when it struck me that I left something in the cart. Casey…just kidding. No, there is no way I left everything I just bought in the cart. I didn’t hear anything crashing and rolling in the trunk as all groceries inevitably do, so I pulled a U-turn (this also confirmed nothing was back there,) and when I arrived back in the parking lot, the groceries were in the cart looking so sad and abandoned. This wouldn’t have been so bad if there wasn’t a lady witnessing me pulling out all the carts to get to mine, and I am pretty sure she thought I was stealing all of the contents to create a grocery hit and run.

2. Walk Gone Wrong

Newborn walks are the best. You get some exercise, time to yourself, and the baby is asleep the whole time. This day, I decided to take advantage of the nice day and go on a long walk. By long walk, I mean a LONG walk. Our main road by our house is one of the busiest roads; but it is a straight shot all the way down and back, plus, I got to show off the fact I was a self-proclaimed hot young mom with an adorable little man. As I was about a mile away from the house, I noticed a darkness was blanketing the sky more than I’d prefer. This was not good, so I upped my pace a bit really believing I could outwalk clouds (didn’t self-proclaim that as much, though.) The first rain drop hit me, and it all went downhill from there, or shall I say, I wish it went downhill since it would probably make me walk faster. It soon was downpouring on us and luckily the stroller covered Casey completely. I was desperate for some kind of tree to interrupt the rain from hitting me straight on, but I was not that lucky. As the cars drove by; I saw all drivers’ faces have looks of pity, smirks from the high schoolers, and some waved at us as my hair started to resemble a wet dog. I honestly may have hopped into a stranger’s car if they offered me candy at that point. As I turned into my neighborhood and the house was in sight, the rain stopped, the sun came out, and I was never going on a long walk again.

3. Lauren in the Headlights

Here’s some pictures with bowls because it was a bowl of awkwardness for me. Change is good, but the process of having to change can take a bit to stick. This is a phenomenon for a lot of things, but the one thing I did not realize would be a learning curve for me was the fact that I would now have to recite someone else’s name and birthday instead of automatically 7/23/98. When we went to a pedes appointment, the receptionist asked for his birthday and I just stood there staring at her like a deer in the headlights; a Lauren in the headlights. I was put on the spot and there was momentarily no information in my brain. Soon, my brain recovered what the months were, but for some reason I could not figure out what number May is (it’s 5.) In my head I played the number and month song I learned in Kindergarten which I use more than I should all these years. But then I realized he was not born on my birthday the 23rd. My brain didn’t seem to remember which day of May he was born on, so I thought back to the picture on Instagram of the announcement sign I used. May 10th, got it. But the year? What year was it? 2023? No, that’s when I got married. 2025, that’s it. Wait never mind that’s next year. 2024, final answer. After about 15 seconds of telling her I needed one second, I spit out 5/10/24. It felt so unfamiliar coming out of my mouth.

I then heard “what is Casey’s full name?” I, again, stood there staring at her and said Lauren Casey. She looked confused and said “so his name is Casey Lauren Casey?” Side note: I am still trying to learn my name is now Lauren Haugen post marriage (see? change doesn’t stick well.) I eventually remembered my name in fact is not Lauren Casey like my Starbucks account still says it is. I replaced my response to her saying his full name is Lauren Michelle Haugen. “No, I need your son’s name, not Mom’s.” I did some calculations in my brain because remembering a new middle name is hard considering mine doesn’t flow off my tongue easily sometimes. I had to think of what Zach’s middle name is, and then reinforced my answer by remembering my brother’s middle name. I was not about to fail this test. I finally finished the equation to proudly tell her Casey David Haugen was my son’s name. She ended with a “are you sure?” That was a proud mom moment.

4. Insurance Hiccup

This one really isn’t that bad, but to continue this doctor appointment theme, I myself was now at one of my appointments. This time I got to resort to my automatic proclamation of my name and birthday which I got 100% on for that test. You know when they ask for your insurance card and you take it out of your wallet, give it to them, they scan it, and then you put it back in your wallet? Such a simple process one might say. Well, I failed the next part of the test. I went to the same section of my wallet where my insurance card lives, but totally forgot that my card now has a new roommate which is Casey’s insurance card. Without thinking I gave it to them. You’d think they’d realize that it wasn’t my card. The thing is, I am aware that the name “Casey” is not a hard core super manly name like Bob, and I have had to explain he is a boy more times than you’d think already. There was no barrier to them scanning the insurance card because of this, but hey, I think I’d look like a good Casey if I wasn’t Lauren. A few days later it randomly hit me in the shower, as that is where all my thinking happens, that I may have given them the wrong one. Knowing myself, I definitely gave them the wrong one. I called back and sure enough, Casey Haugen was in the system for being at the dermatologist as a 1 month old.

5. Flattered…I Think?

You know when you order a drink, the goal is to still get carded? The gals and I currently hate getting carded for our cocktails, because getting a piece of plastic out of a wallet is so much work. If anyone was wondering; my license lives in a different section of my wallet than my insurance card, no mix up there.

Everyone loves to know they look young. But when it comes to the mixed drink of looking young with a shot of mom, it can get awkward, and in those situations I wish I’d get carded by everyone that walks by me while I’m holding Casey. In fact, I wish I had a neon sign on my head that said I am 27. I am aware that I look young, and I think you already know I am going to say that people think I am not Casey’s mom; but it’s more the reaction out of those finding out I am his mom that makes it awkward for me. Since having Casey, I have been asked if I was his nanny for the summer. The response when I said I was his mom? “Oh…well good luck with college with a baby, he’s precious!” All I could think of to say in that moment was a solid “thanks!” (Lauren in the headlights.) I also have gotten the “oh you are just so young to have a baby!” in which I want to say back that I am married, I am 27, my husband is 30, and potentially my whole life story if that isn’t convincing enough. Zach and I still get asked to go get our parents when a solicitor stops by. (Shout out to our neighbor for being our mom according to the pest be gone dude.) The one that I actually don’t mind getting is “you’re a hot mom!” I honestly don’t know if I feel flattered or not in those situations. What would you feel? Because I genuinely don’t know so please decide for me. I’d like to update you on my most recent, and new, situation:

This was a shining moment for my mom, but honestly just downright awkward/interesting for me. My mom and I were out in the lobby at church because a toddler that always wants to move sitting down for an hour is not possible. I was playing with Casey on the ground while my mom was tending to the post service donut holes that live to see the light of day for about 2 seconds. This lady comes up to me smiling saying “oh my goodness your little brother is so cute!” BROTHER. I replied saying that he is my son. I don’t think that quite resonated with her, as she then went up to my mom saying that her kids had a 10 or so year age gap and it was nice that one could babysit the other. Eventually she understood the situation going on here, saying that my mom looked like Casey’s mom, and I indeed, looked like the sibling. Thanks?…(I can see how she may be thrown off a bit though.)

6. Not a moment of silence

A baby crying during a moment of silence or prayer feels awkward to any parent when in reality it probably isn’t. To me, it’s awkward, and this is what I meant when awkwardness means relatability and connection as a parent. A baby crying during a church service is a common issue and people are understanding about that. You’re probably thinking I am going to say that’s what Casey did, but that’s not an issue on my end. Casey is such a happy dude that I never have to worry about a melt down anywhere honestly. What I do know, is that he’s a little dude that likes to figure out how things work and problem solve when he plays with his toys…and makes a noise when doing so. If you give him a toy truck; he will be more interested in how the wheel is connected to the truck, put his finger in the windows of the truck, or see what happens when you put things in the trunk of the truck. I never bring toys for him that have any squeaking, jingles, music etc. What I did not take into account, is that concentration on how his toys work would be just as much as an issue as crying. People are familiar with a baby crying and don’t think much of it, but what they don’t expect is to hear a low sound of a creaky door over and over come out of a tiny human. Slowly, the head turns came in waves right in the middle of prayer. The embarrassment was rising in me as I swept him up and took him into the cry room because there is no such thing as a concentrating room. No more toys during church, just snacks!

7. Easter aquarium

Not so happy Easter

Zach and I prepared to be the Easter bunny for a very long time, and I prepared the Easter outfit, super excited for everyone to see our handsome man at church. Well, it would have been great if we made it out of the parking lot. We had a really nice view of the church from there, though! Our Easter service consisted of sitting in the best curb side parking space playing lullabies instead of hymns. I’d rather describe it as sitting in a struggle bus instead of the car. Let me explain:

Casey was getting progressively crabbier the night before, and did not sleep all night. He even had no interest in what the Easter Bunny brought him. When he has no interest in his blueberry star puff snacks, that’s when you know something is wrong. He was crying all morning and would not nap, which in the parent world, is a complete disaster to be, even though it’s already a disaster in the moment. Not knowing he was sick, we chugged along with the day, and decided to full send going to church already praying that he would not be the one crying baby (ok this is the one exception of him crying in church) in a sanctuary that echos more than someone singing badly in a parking garage.

The moment we pulled out of the driveway he was knocked out. Zach and I pulled up to the church and knew what each other were thinking only by staring at each other. We were not getting out of that car because he needed a nap and we needed our sanity. Now this is not necessarily an awkward story; but it became very uncomfortable feeling like a fish in an aquarium as families, strangers, and families of strangers looked in the car as the hymns began, and we were making absolutely zero effort to get out of the car. All I wanted to do was roll down the window and explain the whole 5 minute long situation of how our morning went in order to justify what we were doing, but alas, that was not an option.

8. Toy fetch

This is more a story of relatability to other parents, but can get uncomfortable depending on how far things are thrown, and the level of Minnesota nice someone is that day. Toddlers are really good at throwing things in order to learn what gravity is, and to be honest they just think it’s funny which sometimes it can be. But when we are out in public it is not really ideal. Going out to dinner takes a lot of preparation than it used to pre kiddo. It is more than picking out what purse goes with my outfit and remembering to spray on some perfume. Dinner prep now means the right toy selection of what will keep him most entertained, what toy bounces the least, and all the snacks. Let’s be real, when people go out anywhere and see that they’re seated by a baby, they probably feel their heart sink a little (same concept as on an airplane) because they are associated with crying, banging, and a big mess. I now empathize and sympathize with parents deeply with the “pick up toy off the ground moment of shame” when it crosses into the territory of the crabby couple or when a waiter almost slips on it with a whole tray of food (whoops.) When Casey chucks his dump truck off the table, I always hope it flies under another table with babies because it isn’t awkward, it honestly feels kind of wholesome, and we take turns picking up each other’s toys. See? Connection and new couple friends!

9. Crying in public

Self-explanatory. No one likes to cry in public I would assume. Crying over spilled milk is a thing and I have done that. Being so frustrated when your kiddo does not want to stay still or drops every single piece of food you give them is the worst! There is so much going on behind the scenes as a parent that sometimes the smallest straw has broken me. I grew up in competitive gymnastics with a coach that made the team do extra conditioning if we cried, and this started in 3rd grade. I have always been stoic because of this, so crying at all is so awkward to me, let alone in front of someone. I’d honestly rather run around wearing my underwear over my pants (that came to mind first, not sure why,) but being a mom has humbled me real quick. Sometimes it just needs to happen when no other way is going to relieve yourself and throwing bricks at a wall isn’t readily available. Embracing awkwardness is learning that it is ok to be vulnerable even when it is caused by a favorite toy dropped in the middle of a pumpkin patch and having to find it like a needle in a haystack.

10. Bad first impressions

When Casey was born, he had some of the worst reflux ever causing him to spit up constantly it felt like. Always at the worst moments ever of course as Lauren luck goes. While there were a lot of moments that he spit up a little bit when people were meeting him, it was a quick wipe up and all good to go! Well, this time was a tad different. Zach and I ventured over to a neighbor’s grad party. I was so excited to use our new baby carrier because I could now have both hands free, and prove to the neighbors that we still live in our house since we never came out of it due to newborn life. I couldn’t wait for the neighbors to see him! We started talking to a neighbor when all of a sudden, my shirt felt a little bit more than damp. I looked down and I now was cradling the most throw up I have ever seen come out of him, and my shirt now became see through. While the neighbors were so nice and understanding because their graduating senior was once probably doing the same thing, I really wished in that moment that their first time meeting him didn’t involve this opposite of cute newborn moment, and seeing more than they bargained for when it came to my wardrobe malfunction. Of course we had no diaper bag to clean anything up, so while Zach took Casey out of the carrier and held him while we walked home. I had the honor of carrying the pool of loveliness as we went back into the house that we seemed to never come out of, and I now wanted to not come out of for a while, or at least with water repellent clothes.

Well folks, you probably were expecting a tad bit more secondhand embarrassment from which I could not give to you this time for once; but as they say, you never know what it feels like until you are a parent. I love hearing parent stories, they’re about as entertaining as hearing others’ stories from college. While I know there are many more ahead of me and these are probably pretty mild, being a mom is truly humbling and I now search for comfort and advice from my other mom friends. In order to do so, I have to actually be vulnerable in order for them to reassure and help me. That means I have to tell you that I performed a grocery hit and run, got laughed at by teenagers while drenched in the rain, temporarily forgot my son’s name, admit I will have the issue of explaining my son is not a girl for the rest of his life, smile while I am thought to be a teenage mom, caused a congregation to stare at my creaky door baby, a dump truck almost caused a waiter’s food to dump, cried for once, and took an unintentional shower in throw up. Did I miss anything?

Have a great start to fall and let’s get awkward!

~Lauren

P.S. Please notice that it did not take me a year to write again, woohoo!

10 Things I’ve Learned in My First Year of Parenting

In honor of my son’s first birthday (tomorrow!) I thought it was fitting to do a post about him and all that we have experienced together! But first; I feel like I need to introduce myself again since it has been a year long hiatus from touching this blog. I am sorry to all of you that have been deprived of my “life-changing” reading material that you probably read when you need to kill time. It is very suiting that this blog is titled “Life of Lauren,” because the life of Lauren has changed significantly since the last time you read anything from me. Sitting down to use my brain for fun has not been appetizing as of late.

Hello! I am Lauren Haugen, formerly Lauren Casey when I started this blog. I am a psychology graduate nerd, former gymnast, Epilepsy warrior, wife to my husband Zach, self-awarded best sister & daughter ever, handstand expert, taco enthusiast, and now I can add Mom (hint: that is the new Life of Lauren part) to my son, Casey, to my list of identities! If anyone wants to know more nitty gritty details on my list such as being allergic to kiwi, or that I am still scarred by misspelling “bandage” during my 5th grade spelling bee, feel free to reach out. (The proctor had an accent and it sounded like “bandish.)” Becoming a parent has been the feeling of a 5am alarm on a Monday, but also the feeling of that first sip of coffee in the morning. With that, here’s a few things that I have, in my opinion, found to be important since becoming a parent!

1. The importance of functional fitness

I am an avid fitness fanatic and always have been. The reason I have worked out in adulthood was to look great at the pool. Now, I work out for a totally different reason because it would be so hard if I didn’t train certain movements that I actually need to do as a parent. It’s also my stress outlet which I definitely need as a parent, too…and I still want to look good at the pool (don’t we all? Come on now, folks.)

Long walk home in Kentucky!

Functional fitness is using hamstrings to bend over and pick up your laundry basket. It is cardio to run after your kids before they use a ballpoint pen to draw sheep on hard wood floors (guilty.) It is getting down and dirty to wipe pureed peas off the floor. It is crawling behind the couch to grab a toy that was chucked across the room. It is simply going up the stairs. Imagine slowly starting to not execute tasks because those muscles aren’t being trained! I will tell you that before having Casey, I didn’t consistently train squats because I had no reason to. I was humbled the first time I dropped something while holding a 5lb baby because I could barely squat to pick it up (I advise new parents to test out which pacifiers bounce the most, and then avoid those at all cost.) I really needed to work on my leg strength, or we’d have a problem. 15 lbs later and I am easily able to do squats while holding a 20lb baby because I train to do so. (I was also able to stand back up in the picture above- wide leg ballet squats are no joke.) It’s amazing seeing the progress I have made, and it feels like when I achieved a new skill in gymnastics “back in the olden days.” Every muscle in my body has had to gain more muscle strength to be used in a lot of different ways, such as holding a newborn and using the bathroom at the same time. That was a proud milestone! Functional fitness truly is important because as it says; it helps you function so you are able to show up for your kids, and for your own health. I unfortunately had to experience what it was like not being able to function for myself, Casey, or quite frankly anyone in paragraphs to come.

2. The floor creaking isn’t the issue

Do you remember watching in movies where parents put the baby to sleep and they tip toe out of the room super quietly so the floor doesn’t creak to avoid waking the baby? Yeah, well this is not the only real issue here. I have stepped on the magic creaking spot in our nursery so many times and Casey does not stir. I have body slammed furniture in the dark and he is fine. I have dropped bottles, tripped over a rug, and more things that you think would wake a baby up, but not him. I started thinking, hey, maybe I just have a heavy sleeper! Awesome! But no, I found the weakness, and that is the weakness of my joints. The problem is when I tip toe out of the room; my ankle pops, a toe joint doesn’t like me in that moment, or a wrist pops even though I somehow am not using it. I never would have thought being a gymnast, or perhaps getting older once I hit 25, would be the culprit. Even at one year old, Casey still wakes up when my big toe pops louder than the high schooler revving his engine near the house thinking he’s cool.

3. A music career is made

Mr. Sun is a fan favorite at ECFE

I am not the kind of gal to sing out loud with others around me. Singing happy birthday was (kind of still is) a struggle, and singing in the car was a no-no. I didn’t even sing in church growing up because that was somehow embarrassing for no reason at all. Now that I am a mom; I sing worship songs to Casey during the service, I can’t wait to be the loudest in the room to sing happy birthday to him (mom duties.) I belt out the songs at the top of my head in the car to try and keep him entertained even if they are not child appropriate . I sing the Barney theme song daily, Zach and I perform duets, we sing the songs at ECFE together, and I kind of sing nursery songs. By kind of, I mean I pathetically realized I forgot the words to the most common songs including Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. But what I have come to realize, is I began to write my own singles on the spot without any thought of what words are coming out of my mouth. It is like filling a space with sound to entertain Casey, just like it is talking about the weather to fill space when joining a work call. Let’s hope I don’t mix those up sometime. If that were the case, my coworkers would hear my album including my hits Put your Pants on Song, That’s My Little Man, Change the Poopy, What Are We Going to Wear Today, and Bath Time Bath Time. Stay tuned for my next album dropping soon!

4. Wear a bike helmet

This is going to be long, folks. As I previously mentioned, I got a taste of what it was like to not be able to do anything for anyone, let alone hold my son. It was awful, and it woke me up to see that I need to think about all the situations or danger I put myself in, because I need to always be there as a wife, and a mom. Here’s what I mean- I signed up to do the 36 mile Tour De Tonka bike ride in August 2024. I hopped on my road bike and put my helmet on that morning with no idea I would be proving the point that helmets save lives as we all heard from every grown up when we were kids when we didn’t want to wear them because they didn’t look cool (me.) I think you all know I’m about to say I crashed my bike, but this is so much more than a bike crash.

I was a few miles in going down a hill when I looked at my speedometer, and it flashed that I was going 25mph. I looked back up and the girl in front of me suddenly braked real hard causing my instincts to kick in. My instincts told me that smashing into the girl was not the best option, but turning my handlebars sharply to the left and bracing myself for a lot of road rash was the next best thing. I remember as I was on the way down being more concerned about crying in front of strangers rather than the fact I’d probably have no skin left on my body. Seconds later, I hit the ground, but it didn’t hurt because the light switch in my head turned off. I woke up to paramedics standing over me, asking me what the date was, in which I responded “I don’t know, but I never know anyways.” They were happy I still kept my bad humor. I was impressed no one else was lying in the road considering I smacked the pavement in the middle of the pack. I guess everyone else’s instincts were better at avoiding running someone over. My bike’s chain came off, but other than that, it was fine. I also looked fine on the outside, I only had one scratch on my finger, but that is because I hit the concrete so hard that I didn’t slide. I was told my helmet sacrificed itself and cracked inside to save my head from cracking instead (have you ever seen a cracked inside of a helmet? Yeah, me neither.) But just like my helmet cracked on the inside, I was cracked on the inside, too.

Holding Mom’s hand when I visited her

It only took me a few seconds to break my hip, 4 ribs, my collarbone, become concussed with a small brain bleed, bruise a lung, and tear the artery in my neck that supplies blood to my brain. Go big or go home am I right? The next few days were an absolute blur between all the scans, neurologists, TBI docs, orthopedists and anyone else that thought I got hit by a car. You’d be surprised how many times I had to tell someone that this was indeed, a one woman show. I left the hospital with some party favors to commemorate this experience being a hot new ride to wheel me around while I was told I couldn’t walk for up to 6 months. I also brought home 2 new plates and 14 screws to hold my collarbone together. They assured me it would be ok, because I wouldn’t be setting alarms off in the airport for the rest of my life since they were fancy Titanium. #boujee! Lastly, I was prohibited from lifting anything over 10lbs so my artery would not tear more. Because of this, I could not pick up my 3 month old son, go up the stairs to his nursery unless my wheelchair could sprout wings, get up to feed him when he needed me, and play with him. All I could do was just be present, and I hoped that was enough for him to feel like I was his mom. I struggled with this deeply, as I was already struggling with postpartum thoughts of how I truly believed he didn’t like me as much as everyone else.

I had to move to a more wheelchair accessible home, aka my parent’s house. I time traveled back to what felt like high school again, and my boyfriend would come over to visit and hang out and then leave at night; except it was my husband. Zach brought Casey over after work, and took him home later. I joke that it felt like Zach and I were separated with 50/50 custody over Casey. I really wished that bad joke I made was actually a bad joke, but it was my reality at the moment. I was so motivated to get back to good health for both of them, that I worked hard to get out of the wheelchair in one month instead of 3-6 as predicted. I skipped to crutches (my pride refused to use a walker), and I was able to walk fully on my own within 2-3 months with no help. I will say, I was sad to see the shower chair go because that was kind of relaxing. The gnarly scar on my collarbone is the tattoo that will be on me forever to remind me of the most memorable year of my life! So, long story that wasn’t short: be more aware of what you do, and think of those who depend on you…and of course, wear your bike helmet.

5. You need more bottles than you think you do

I was a firm believer that I needed maximum 3 bottles, because they could just be cleaned in order to use them again! I saw videos everywhere about how annoying it is to clean bottles, and all I thought was geez, it’s really not that hard. Boy, I sure take my words back and agree with those videos. Before becoming a parent, there was no way for me to realize how dreadful of a task cleaning a bottle would be. It isn’t just because I didn’t do any research or perform google rabbit hole sessions; it truly is a “you don’t know until you know” feeling. I quickly learned after a full day of sleep deprivation mixed with pumping, normal human activities, remembering that you have to take care of yourself, taking time to eat, and total justified laziness; cleaning a singular bottle is the last thing I wanted to do. A top 5 worst feeling is going to grab a bottle for a feeding in the middle of the night, seeing there are none, and having to clean one while holding your cranky tired baby in hand (also why upper body functional fitness is needed.) Even having a one year old, it still makes my stomach sink when I am FINALLY about to go up to bed for the night, and there are all the sinister bottles that need to be cleaned sitting at the sink staring at me. The little teddy bears and rainbows on the bottles turn into grizzly bears and thunderstorms. Invest in more bottles, and tag team with an amazing spouse like mine!

6. Burp cloths are a new decor item

Peas please!

This is more for the earlier months, but I learned that burp cloths are not just for the instances of burping post feeding. They need to be everywhere you can think of, especially when you have an infant with bad reflux. Casey would hit me with spit up when I was least expecting it which was always instances when there was no burp cloth within reach. This included at a grad party while neighbors were meeting him for the first time. As someone who is a neat freak, this was not acceptable, and no drop of spit up, or puree, belongs on any article of clothing or upholstery. I now have alpaca themed burp cloths sprinkled all over the house that have become one with our modern decor. Burp cloths really should be named something else that eludes to the fact they are made for more than they get credit for, and I wish I had the tip of asking for ones that compliment my decor. If that is not a thing, you may be finding me on Shark Tank eventually.

7. Nap jail is real

Newborn naps on my chest are the best. There is nothing like looking down at a cute little baby that you made, knowing that you are a new mom and life is so good. Finally, the baby is sleeping and you can get some R&R. Life is good until you realize you need to go to the bathroom, your phone is out of reach, the doorbell rang, your coffee is on the other side of the room, or my personal favorite; you need to sneeze. Contact nap jail, or sick baby snuggles jail, is a very real concept that I never thought would be an issue. About 2 months in, I felt I was past the feeling of never wanting to put my baby down. I now realized the importance of utilizing precious time when the baby was sleeping. I now faced the predicament of not wanting to disturb a peacefully slumbering baby to go put him in the crib and risk waking him up, or getting things done. It is the feeling of playing Jenga trying to get up as slowly as I could to transfer to the crib. All I want is to go clean the whole house while I could (sleep when the baby sleeps wasn’t a thing for me). I ultimately decide to stay in nap jail most of the time, but it always is the best and wholesome jailtime.

8. Days fly by, unless you miss a nap

This is not the same as “time flies” in the sense where your child grows up right before your eyes (although that is still true.) It is amazing how short days feel when living them out in 3 hour chunks, when usually watching the clock makes it feel even slower. Running on a schedule of nap, feed, play adding up to 3 hour chunks really does make for cyclical days. Some days it is great because it makes time with Zach, bed time, or anything I am looking forward to come faster. On the converse, it is not enough time in the day for when there’s so much I need to get done. As Casey has gotten older and we have actually ventured out of the house now that we have come out of winter hibernation, we are doing a lot more things! It is so fun getting to take him places, but the one drawback? The leash we are on connected to nap time. The ripple effect that comes from missing a nap turns into a windy day on Lake Superior (bad.) The day goes from short, to the never ending day as I eye the clock and it is midnight due to an off schedule crabby baby. Thankfully now that we are at one year old, he can last so much longer in between naps, reducing the probability of the day from heck (insert double hockey sticks at your liking.) Time management is so important as a parent, and we are becoming so good at it. A year later, we can now stick to a schedule, dodge and weave activities to incorporate naptimes, and tag team to juggle any curveballs!

9. Toy rejection

His favorite for a while!

Before Casey arrived, I was so excited to add all these new toys to the registry and imagine how we would play with it and use it. This also includes how I was excited to play with it myself…having a baby is a socially acceptable way to do kid things again (I have been having a blast going on playgrounds again.) I can report to you that he did not care at all about the fancy new pacifiers I got him due to rejecting them at 2 months (I now realize this is a blessing). I also got cool teethers -literally and physically-that can be put in the fridge for when he started teething. He is now teething, and he does not like said teethers. Babies just sometimes don’t take what they get, in our case would prefer playing with a package of wet wipes and a cardboard box. I am sure if he understood the concept of receipts and how they are used to return things, rather than chew on them, he would be taking some back. I guess babies have the courage to flat out reject what they get instead of smile and act like they like what was opened on Christmas, but know it will be returned discretely.

10. I am never “fine this one time”

I have this issue of thinking I am immune to things. The phrase “I’ll be fine just this one time.” Or, “I won’t need it, I won’t be out long,” is now out of my vocabulary. I unfortunately had to learn this the hard way leaving me panicked and helpless. Let me set the scene. It was a nice Sunday afternoon, and Casey just did great during the service at church. A perfect gentleman some might say. My family goes out to brunch every Sunday to the same spot, so I thought hey, might as well keep the good times rolling. My luck was soon to end in the next hour. Casey had on his new khakis that day, his first time wearing anything other than Carter’s cotton stretchy pants, so he was a big fashion boy now. Zach was at his soccer league game, so I ventured to church myself that day which means I packed the diaper bag. I thought I would be in the clear for not including a backup outfit in the bag, when usually I do. Diapers in the diaper bag is all I needed! Halfway through lunch, I hear grunting, and then a big smile. I knew what this meant, so off we went to the bathroom, come to find that either Casey did not like his new khakis, the universe was teaching me a lesson to always bring a backup outfit, or both. I think we can put two and two together with what happened here, and needless to say, if any of the above phrases pop into my head no matter how old he has gotten, I do not believe whatever my brain tells me, and remember how not-immune I am to the “just this one time” concept.

11. Get out of your bubble

I lied, I have 1 more thing I wanted to talk about that I realized by reflecting on this first year, it has enriched my life more than I thought it did. Hindsight is a great thing if you use it! When moving to the suburbs and being a new mom, especially the first mom in my MN friend group; it’s lonely! I have wanted so badly to find people in my same stage of life, so I decided to do something about it. I extended myself and now have joined a MomCo. group at a local church that meets on Mondays. It has filled my cup so much just hanging out and laughing about things only moms can relate to over coffee, crafts, weird baby things, and terribly cheesy Hallmark movies that we bond over by mocking every single thing. It’s been a great resource for things such as referrals for the best place to get Casey’s first haircut, hand me downs, feeding tips, and all the mom type things you can probably conclude on your own.

Zach and I also signed up for ECFE (it is like pre-pre school for those who don’t know.) We love going every Tuesday night as Casey gets to learn new skills, meet other babies, and all the parents get to connect on all sorts of topics. This week Casey touched jell-o for the first time, and all of the parents got to laugh together at his response of being freaked out. Oh how heartwarming, right? It is really great bonding over seeing what weird things babies do. Highly recommend! Lastly, I go to Mom’s Evening’s nights at my home church every once in a while, which has been great getting to meet other moms in the church! I never would have guessed I would be in 3 groups and while I may be spread thin at times, I am totally ok with that!

While I could extend this list significantly; I hope this brought you some joy, laughter, tips, secondhand embarrassment, or a walk down memory lane. A lot has happened this year if you did not pick up on that, but it has all had a purpose. Becoming a mom has made me more understanding, appreciative, created closer relationships, helped me learn to ask for help (well…maybe 3.5% increase,) makes me regulate hard emotions better as they come, and has shown me that Zach and I are a great team. Being a great team together is the home base of all of this, and absolutely crucial as new parents. I am incredibly blessed for Zach and the way he rubs off on Casey in the best ways! Casey is the happiest handsome little man that has improved our lives significantly. Life without him would look mean a lot less terrible tone deaf songs, a life with less blowouts in one stall bathrooms, less early mornings, less highly caffeinated drinks, less neon baby toy tornadoes, less pureed chicken rice stains, less hair ripped out of my head, and less wrestling over trying to get “boogies”… but I would not trade it for anything on this earth. I love having the privilege to be his mom, and always will cherish this first year of his life! Happy birthday to my sweet Casey Boy!

Have a great week, folks! I hope to write again before a year from now!

~Lauren

Pregnancy and Epilepsy: Not quite what I expected

Hello everyone! In light of Purple Day (tomorrow) March 26th, a day to recognize and celebrate those living with Epilepsy; I am addressing the most frequent topics I have been asked about the past 7 months: “How has it been going? How is Epilepsy affecting your pregnancy so far? ” I want this post to be a source to those with Epilepsy that have found absolutely nothing regarding real experiences of pregnancy. I came up empty handed when researching what would happen to me compared to everyone else the next 9 months. At first, I also asked how Epilepsy would affect pregnancy…but I didn’t know I was asking the wrong question. I should have been asking how pregnancy would affect my Epilepsy. Even so, there is no information on that either. Friends and family members may think I can be too open about personal topics sometimes; but I choose to be open because 1. Someone needs to create awareness about those who live with a disability that is invisible. It is hard to empathize with the fear Epileptics have every single day, and now there is a major change potentially creating a recipe like my cooking…horrendous. And 2. I am not a child anymore, but in fact, an adult that experiences shared female biological processes-no need to hide 🙂 Lastly, I intend to make this helpful for those without Epilepsy because I experience all non Epilepsy symptoms, too; but not even close to similar scary stories that I read about. Main point as I am in my third trimester now: Epilepsy isn’t the villain here, but rather, pregnancy has been the villain to Epilepsy.

“I bet you are so excited, right?”

Not quite something to Google, but something I was asked a lot. Of course I am! But also not totally. Google was the first to find out my news that I would be incubating a human. This news opened the door to the panicked search of doom even though I followed all preparation precautions. What I mean by this, is those with Epilepsy have to do a lot more specific planning before “regular” pregnancies, but also have to plan beforehand the action plan for med changes/managing triggers immediately after the baby is born. News flash-Epilepsy does not stop once the baby is born! As mentioned, all I found on Epilepsy was the cookie cutter “call your neurologist with any concerns” type answers. In this case, I would call and not hang up the phone! I found absolutely NOTHING in depth about certain pregnancy medications, or the real concerns I had. I continued searching and tried every phrase combination, including trying different ways to misspell it since I have seen “Epsilpy” and “Epilepcy” more times than you’d think.

I also felt/feel pending guilt because I know that those who live with, know someone, or are about to be grandparents/uncles & aunts to a child coming from someone with Epilepsy are depending on me. I know there is an unsaid fear that the baby will be “messed up or not normal.” This is not a lack of better term. I have already heard it a time or two. The only thing I can give comfort about is the fact mine is not genetic, but rather, the result of a brain infection from chronic Lyme Disease that was discovered by going to an alpaca farm. Just a tad bit different! (I went down the Lyme Disease googling rabbit hole, too.)

“Are Epilepsy medications harmful during pregnancy?”

I am no doctor, so do not quote me in APA format, or any format, for your research papers. This topic was 100% the one I googled the most. I even considered pausing my meds for 9 months by telling myself “focal seizures aren’t that bad! I will resort back to staying up all night which will prevent the Grand Mal and fear of them happening.” This was my life before my diagnosis, and living in sleep deprivation + fear of my own brain probably would not work out! Giving up meds isn’t like giving up caffeine, cold cuts, or a cold one. Grand Mal seizures are high risk and potentially fatal to an unborn child because unconsciousness cuts off oxygen to the baby. Epilepsy medications can impact fetal growth with a teeny tiny chance of abnormalities such as preterm birth or defects, but I have been directed a few times to the maternal fetal medicine specialist because of this. I made Zach go with me because navigating new places and parallel parking is scary…oh, and to see our baby (moments like these make it seem like I am not the adult I said I was earlier.) This has nothing to do with anything, I just thought this needed an intermission from seriousness.

Thankfully, my focal seizures don’t affect baby because I stay conscious, but I made sure I came off the walk-the-line- harmful meds, and increased the dosage of the said to be “safe meds.” This brought me to my next question to dig deeper into Google.

“What Epilepsy medications are okay for pregnancy?”

Thankfully, more research has been done on Epilepsy medications and 2 out of 3 of my medications are Class B (pretty much known to be perfectly fine during pregnancy). These are Keppra and Lamictal. The third one I am on, Oxcarbazepine, one I have worked hard to learn to spell, is a Class C drug. This means no research has been done at all. Basically, I have to risk it for the biscuit – or rather, the bun in the oven. For those of you on Oxcarpazepine; this is my first hand experience saying all my anatomy scans, heartbeat checks, ultrasounds, and baby heart echo have been completely normal. My biscuit/bun is cooking well! But, for the slim amount of people, like me, that need to be on more medication than one to control seizures; this increases risk. It can get frustrating knowing that the way my Epilepsy responds to medications is totally out of my control, and I won’t know the impact it has on other traits until the bun can come out of the oven.

Remember how I said I had to do more to prepare? Before getting pregnant, I had to start taking an abnormally large dose of prescription folic acid for neural tube growth. I was warned that Lamictal is the ONLY drug proven to respond like a rodeo rider during pregnancy because it breaks down quicker than the body can absorb it, and makes folic acid do the same. I didn’t give that much thought, as I thought it was like one of those commercials stating Ibuprofen’s potential side effect could be death aka unlikely. This is the part where pregnancy is the villain, and I got bullied very quickly. Once I hit 5-ish weeks, I started having uncontrollable focal seizures during the day. Considering mine are nocturnal, this was terrifying for me, and royally screwed up one day in particular with family visiting. I resorted to hiding away because my seizures aren’t easy to watch, even for myself. It was hard to explain to family that week why my Epilepsy was a dumpster fire without revealing our secret that pregnancy was the cause, or without making up something sounding like a bad excuse paralleling to a dog ate my homework!

I have always been embarrassed for anyone to see what my seizures look like, even my own parents, heck, even my dog used to look at me like what are you doing to yourself? It was that exact day I saw side effects are real and I realized pregnancy & Epilepsy were going to interact like water and oil. As I sit here writing today, I still struggle with stopping my focal seizures and have to adjust Lamictal almost monthly.

“How terrible is first trimester?”

Once my meds somewhat balanced out my Epilepsy, I braced myself for my romantic dates with the toilet and every other general terrible symptom I read about. To prove I am still a psych nerd; there is a concept in psychology called the negativity bias which states that more negative experiences are reported than positive because that is how we make sense of the world in a primal way. Bad=avoid=stay alive. We totally dismiss the good. Knowing this concept very well, I still convinced my brain that nothing good comes from the first trimester even though I know 50% of people do have good experiences. To all the folks looking for a good first trimester account, I am your real proof! My first trimester was delightful (like actually, I am not being sarcastic like I usually am). I still resumed going to the gym everyday, work, no cravings, and had dates with Zach instead of the toilet. The only symptom I experienced was being repulsed by grilled chicken, almond butter even though I never eat it, and popcorn. So what did my Epilepsy do to the first trimester? Absolutely nothing, except remove popcorn while watching a movie. My first trimester was my best one…but what comes up, must come down.

“Is it true that Epilepsy gets better with pregnancy?”

With the little information I found, yes it does for “normal” folks due to hormones stabilizing in second trimester! For those of you with Epilepsy reading to confirm this information…do not confirm so fast. My second trimester was the weirdest in the sense that if I did not have Epilepsy, it would have been perfectly fine with the perfect pregnancy glow and perfect energy surge and all other things perfect. Again, pregnancy swooped in and bullied my Epilepsy. I did not know my brain would gift me with pattern-like vertigo after taking my meds everyday, last until exactly noon, then magically stop. It started being a once a month type thing, usually on Sundays before church (the Lord did not provide me any help while putting eyeliner on, spinning in the mirror.) Eventually this weird “thing” turned into a daily routine. This made me have to rely on rides anywhere before noon, and needed assistance walking among other tasks until noon. Then, I could do all those things myself again.

I can report that it is still ongoing in the third trimester. The lovely part that I have learned is drinking water does not help as water cures all things in most people’s minds, but rather, makes it worse and put to use the man’s job of being a human pony tail holder. To those with Epilepsy, or care takers; the dangerous part here, along with morning sickness if experienced, is medications need to stay down otherwise that equates to not taking a dose of meds. I learned that even one missed dose screws up the occurrence of my seizures. This strange spinny symptom, hands down, is the worst part of my pregnancy and is a warning!

“Can I drink coffee while pregnant?”

This is a general pregnancy question, but I quickly learned Epilepsy is involved in the weirdest way; and no, not increased seizures like I was worried about. Coffee may not be your cup of tea, but if a cup of tea is your cup of tea; just stick around for the caffeine part. Yes, 250mg of caffeine is perfectly fine during pregnancy (this is the tea part-it has caffeine. Chocolate does too! Sorry to report that.) My 8 ounces of coffee everyday is not even close to 250mg-perfect! I am all good, I thought. But (there’s always a but), I have learned that if I wake up before 8am, take my meds, and then take even one sip of coffee, Zach is back on duty as pony tail holder, and my meds are gone. After this lovely experience, I am fine and can go back to sipping on my coffee like nothing ever happened. No nausea at all. This never happened before pregnancy, but now this pattern happens every time, and I have no clue why! 8:15? Perfectly fine. 7:45? Not fine. The only equation I can chalk this up to is Pregnancy + Epilepsy meds + coffee + certain sleep cycle?… = a bad start to my morning. If anyone is good at this kind of math, please help me.

“Can I still workout while pregnant?”

For those with Epilepsy, maybe give this a try. The rule of thumb here is if one works out at a certain intensity before getting pregnant, then it is perfectly fine/even recommended to do so throughout the 9 months. On the converse, if you are not an active person and decide you have a craving for running a marathon instead of craving pickles; that would be a very large issue. I wish I had learned this tidbit of the ability to transfer intensity before freaking out at the fact I started sweating during a cycle session. I did in fact call the doctor to see if sweating meant I overheated and cooked my biscuit/bun. Warning: to all my heated yoga girlies- this is the only part where cooking yourself cooks your baby). Working out is important for my Epilepsy, and always has been, because working out is my method of stress relief. Every person with Epilepsy has certain triggers that make their condition worse. Mine is stress, and straying from routine. My habit of working out daily since I trained 20 hours a week starting in 5th grade is why this helps relieve stress. It is what I am used to and I enjoy it! Working out in general has helped me dodge the swelling of my limbs, and a lot of other symptoms due to core strength and blood circulation! For those struggling with those symptoms- give this a go!

“Is it true that I have to sleep on my left side?”

This may be a thing that only relates to my type of Epilepsy. As I was spending my mornings googling, I stumbled upon information saying that it was better to sleep on the left side to help with blood and oxygen flow, rather than the right side. I had to make sure this was real, but I couldn’t find anything concrete. According to WebMD, it was true. The fact I considered WebMD being correct means a lot, because I physically can’t. Most people’s issue with sleeping on a certain side is due to preference or avoiding their spouse’s bad breath…but because of my Epilepsy, I can’t sleep on my left side. Sounds odd, right? Again, another reason why a demand of pregnancy affects my Epilepsy. Sleeping on my left side has always been a trigger for me, and never fails to fire up a focal seizure. Why? I can confidently explain this to you as I have no clue. This still remains no matter how much medication I am on. My focal seizures turned into “unconscious spells” as I called them before I knew they were Grand Mal seizures every time I was on my left side. Knowing this information actually helped me get my Epilepsy diagnosis. All I had to do was sleep on my left side for my overnight sleep study because I knew this trigger. I try to sleep on my left side occasionally to reap the said benefits. The only comfort in this is knowing that Zach will grab me to stop it all if my body decides to behave like a terrible two toddler.

“Do I have to eat differently with Epilepsy during pregnancy?”

No insightful answer here, it’s a no on my end. For some, Keto may be required (fun fact, Keto was “made” for Epilepsy, not for getting rid of your lovely love handles). But a tip to everyone in case you forgot, eat a vegetable today!

To sum this whole post up, which I probably could have done in one sentence instead of lots of paragraphs; Epilepsy does not affect pregnancy if the established precautions are taken, but rather, pregnancy is more of a threat to Epilepsy. This is all the fortunate and unfortunate personal research I have gathered along the way as someone with Focal Onset Frontal Lobe Epilepsy. I hope this brings peace to some, or a warning for what to look out for. I can tell you, I have googled many many many many more things but will not list them here because of their stupidity. I will always continue to spread awareness whether that be in small ways, making MN bridges purple, and now I can add my story being featured on the National Epilepsy Foundation social media channels to the list. If you remember, feel free to join me in all things purple on March 26. Wear something purple, drink grape juice, eat a purple potato, or cuddle a Barney stuffed animal…is it just me that has one of those?…Forget I just said that.

Thanks to all those who made it to the end here and continue to follow my adventures with Epilepsy and our little boy coming in May!

~Lauren

10 Everyday Things I am Grateful For

A few years ago, I wrote a post centered around Thanksgiving and reflecting on what I was grateful for…friends, family, health etc. While that is all great, it’s a snooze. The next year, I decided to shift my focus to things that everyone can be grateful for, but they just forget to be grateful for them. That gained a bit more traction! Now, I have started a tradition of bringing attention to the little things that I simply cannot live without…or at least it feels like I can’t. With that, here are the 10 things I am grateful for this year!

1. A Good Pen

The most significant reason I have learned a good pen is something to be grateful for is when I wrote wedding thank you notes this July (I need to break friends and family rule here and give a sincere shoutout to my parents for how I am so thankful that they made the wedding happen…quite literally. The father of the bride cleaning up the bridal suite should not have been on his agenda but everyone forgets those little details behind the scenes.) Anyways, back to the important thing here, pens. Certain pens make my handwriting look like Zach’s handwriting, but sometimes you find one that understands your needs. I now have a relationship with a pen that stays with me at work all day, writes my grocery lists, wishes my parents happy birthday, and so much more. The only thing it doesn’t do is go to bed with me at night. There is a reason that people pay hundreds of dollars for a pen…and that will still 100% never be me.

2. Cake

Once again, another thing that our wedding gave me an epiphany about was just how grateful I am for cake. But it is not the spongy dessert itself with those beautiful nasty frosting roses that I am thankful for; it is the fact that cake is the food we use to celebrate everything! As I was eating the birthday cake I brought for my friend’s birthday last month, it made me reflect on how appreciative I am that it is the one food we consistently use to house a stick of fire otherwise known as a candle.

You may be thinking, Lauren, it’s just a cake. No, it’s not. Imagine going to a wedding, and the couple comes out and cuts a bowl of microwaved mashed potatoes together. Have you ever tried to cut mashed potatoes? Well let me tell you, I haven’t either. Although, I may try that at Thanksgiving because I am curious as to what that looks like now. What if you went to a birthday party, and a candle is stuck in a giant bowl of mayo. Maybe a platter of lettuce to celebrate a baby shower? You get it. And now, the next time you see a cake staring at you at a family function, give it the love it deserves even if it has those nasty, sugar rush, bright red roses that turn your teeth red. Cake = celebration, and be grateful it is not any other food!

3. Shared Experiences

As a 2020 graduate, I have only been exposed to the virtual work world minus the one time a month I go into the office. This means, all current mannerisms and procedures are all I have ever known. But…I made an observation that I am sure everyone can relate to. When you join a work meeting, the way to break the silence exchanging the “hi how are you- good, how are you?” sentences. It then transitions into conversations about precipitation, or the lack of precipitation. After that, the meeting is as dull as a gloomy Monday with a chance of precipitation. I have always enjoyed going against social norms and being the one that brings weird humor to work. Every morning I like to wish my manager a happy whatever national day it is. For example, today is National Absurdity Day. It is very entertaining and a great way to start the day because the concepts are something everyone can relate to (not sure if absurdity day is a good thing to relate to…)

One day I decided to do a little psychology experiment regarding how being honest changes meeting dynamics. As I hopped on my meeting and the “how are you today?” was asked, I was honest and I told her that I fell down the stairs that morning- which was true. A heck of a way to start a Monday! I think that was the first time I have ever heard a laugh on a meeting. We then discussed experiences of falling down the stairs as more people joined, and they were eager to share when they fell down the stairs, too. After that, the meeting was a lot more upbeat and people actually listened each other’s ideas. This is why I love psychology!

There are so many more experiences that people share, we just forget to talk about them. You would be surprised how many people are itching to share about how they sliced their finger cutting onions, got in car accidents, and fell down the stairs head first rather than feet first with the bumpy ride all the way down. For the record, I have brought up good things too, but the bad are the most entertaining.

4. Medications

I think a lot of people can relate to the routine of walking down the stairs every morning, looking at horse pills for various conditions, despising having to walk ALL THE WAY across the kitchen to get a glass of water, having to wait for your cup to be full, and mustering up the courage to swallow something whole which the human body was not primally designed to do. Side note- one time in middle school I didn’t want to swallow my Ibuprofen so I put it in my sandwich at lunch. Do not do that, ever, unless you like the taste of extreme bitter chalky substances. Let me continue: think of the time you felt the most sick in your life. I will give you a few seconds to relive that terrible time. What if you had absolutely nothing to help? What if you had a kidney infection while on the way to Duluth to a family function and had to stop in Sandstone Minnesota? (in case you didn’t pick up on the very specific details, this is a Lauren story. You’d have to have a heck of a reason to go to Sandstone). Medication and supplements are something to be grateful for daily, even if that means having to take the time to pill prep your little pill boxes. Thank your Flintstone vitamins-but not the grape ones, those are gross.

In all seriousness, I truly am eternally grateful. A lot of you have followed my story, but for those who haven’t, my past posts will provide you with information that makes this seem less insane. The day I was diagnosed with Epilepsy after going on a 14 year road trip to “H-E- double hockey sticks” and back was one of the happiest days of my life. Not many people cry tears of joy when they are told they are diagnosed with a lifelong condition, but I sure did. When I tell others how relieved I am to be diagnosed with Epilepsy, they probably think I am the reason for national absurdity day.

The day I pulled up to the Walgreens drive thru window and the crabby lady with blue hair handed me my first Anti Epilepsy Drug called Keppra, it felt like one of the proudest moments of my life. I may need to name my first child Keppra because I am so grateful there is a medication to help the monster in my brain that I’ve housed since I was 10. Every birthday I’ve had, I’d blow out my candle on my cake (see? no mashed potatoes) and I would always wish for my quality of life to get just a little bit better- not all the way better because I didn’t think that was an option for me. I can only hope that everyone that doesn’t have hope will experience this feeling of their wish becoming beyond true. I will continue to preach for the rest of my life how grateful I am to have medication even though I will be on it the rest of my life, because it only took one single hour to fix 14 years of waiting.

5. Underwear

I had en eye opening experience this year that made me truly realize how important underwear are. I am an advocate for underwear after forgetting to pack any on my honeymoon. Best part? I was on an island in which no store sold any. To end my story, I happened to go into a gag gift shop on the LAST DAY, and found “emergency disposable underwear.” So I tell you now, when you pull out your next pair today, and remember that you never know what you miss until it is gone.

6. Toilet Bowl Brushes

This is probably the last thing you’d think of, and that is the point of this whole post, but I am eternally grateful that I do not have to go elbow deep in a toilet when it needs a good scrub. I tend to think that toilet brushes are gross in general, but really, it is the hero. It does the deed that everyone tries to avoid- it gets no say in the matter. I think I have said enough.

7. Screwdrivers

Who is a fan of Ikea, or ordering furniture online because going to the store takes too much time and effort? I keep forgetting the fact that going to the store and getting already assembled furniture takes less effort than putting together your own even if it is delivered to your doorstep. As Zach and I have been making our house look less deserted, we have found a new hobby in putting furniture together with not so helpful directions, and breaking down giant boxes with too much styrofoam. Sure, trying to follow those directions is hard…but can you imagine trying to do the job without the screwdriver? As I watch Zach put together our furniture and give him emotional support since I can’t seem to get it right, I can’t imagine how he’d put together our latest endeavors without that thing. Just for your information, I do participate in household activities because I am the one who is so grateful for my friend the toilet bowl brush!

8. Emergency Stop Buttons

When you are at the gym, do you hop on a treadmill and immediately put the little emergency stop clip on, or ever used the red emergency stop button? No. Everyone is too cool for school to wear that thing. Have you ever seen someone fly off a treadmill, or at least understand the concept that if you fall on a treadmill, you would shoot backwards? You see, I am GREAT at kicking it up a notch of what would already be humiliating. This is not a story about how I flew off the treadmill. It is a story about how I stayed on the treadmill.

To set the scene: I had a terrible day and went on the treadmill to do some sprints to blow some steam sporting my brand new white shoes (remember this part). This stress relief method is a typical thing for me. I finished my interval at 13mph and pressed up on the sidebars to straddle the track to take a breather…except I missed a foot. My feet whipped out from under me and my immediate reflex was to hold on when any normal person would probably surrender and let go….except I did not let go. In my head, I didn’t want to be THAT person at the gym that shoots off the back hitting whatever was behind me. Instead, I let myself be dragged all while I didn’t realize the skin on my legs was slowly being sanded down in the process. As I was being dragged, I took a moment and contemplated in my head: do I let go? hmmm, I think I am just going to hold even though I have no solution to this problem….but I don’t want to end up like that lady who held on and the belt made her pants fly off. I decided to hold on, and tried my hardest to discretely be in crisis. Gratefully, a stranger came over and hit the emergency stop button, and another stranger came over and picked me up like a rag doll. I then looked down to see the finished product of sanded my knees. They would make my 6th grade Tech Ed teacher proud! But I looked down farther and in horror, I saw the giant black stains on my brand new white shoes. I went to the locker room to clean myself up, and despite my legs being as raw as uncooked chicken, I was more concerned about cleaning up my shoes first. Priorities.

9. The Library

My memory of the library is sitting in elementary school being forced to check out books I’d never read every week, and learning how to use the encyclopedia. It was also being a part of the summer reading program in which my brother and I had to read a certain amount of minutes every week in order to get a prize that was 100% not worth it at the end of the summer. That being said, I have not visited a library again until this year. I spent so much money on sappy romance novels this year, and then gave them away because I am not one to read a book twice. Zach mentioned I should get a library card, and then I can read books galore for free! I thought this concept was too good to be true until I looked at all the options and realized all the books I read in the past year were at the library! I realized now that libraries don’t equate to reading dictionaries and encyclopedias. The concept of being an adult now and using a library again is the greatest invention I have discovered this year, and I don’t care if the childish cartoon Babe the Blue Ox is on it.

10. Quality Knives

I am hesitant to put this on here because this has been a mixed bag thus far. I will get to that story in a bit. Before getting our new knife block, I had hand me down knives that were useless for anything besides a vegetable. Honestly, this probably would have been safer due to the fact I am not good with sharp things. I truly did not know that knives had names and each name is meant to cut different things! (Zach is the chef in the house, thankfully not me). This has made making meals so much faster and easier. Except for when it wasn’t…

It was the day after my traumatic treadmill incident (remember this part). Zach was chopping an onion when all of a sudden he wasn’t chopping the onion anymore. I will spare the details but I finally convinced him that fingers should not bleed that much. To all the men out there, put aside your pride and go to the dang doctor! We got there and were ushered over to a bed in the hallway since no rooms were available. Maybe everyone in Woodbury was chopping their fingers that night, who knows, but every nurse that walked by immediately thought we were there due to the fact I was missing a lot of skin on my legs. I was very entertained by how many stares we got starting at my legs, transitioning over to Zach getting stitched up! To end with a cherry on top, a month later I sliced my hand by cutting a stick of butter (yes I know, I am still trying to figure out how I did that, too).

That’s all I have for you this year! I mentioned this in the past, but every morning I write down three of the most mundane things I am grateful for. This really opens my eyes to all the things that make my life so much easier and better! Think about your 10 things to be grateful for this year. You can do this during your morning coffee, drive on the way home, in the shower, cooking dinner, doing laundry, fixing a fence, during a very important work meeting, cutting your phalanges, hanging upside down, putting up your Christmas tree way too early, and any other ridiculous times to do this. There has been so much to be grateful for, is so much to be grateful for, and will be so much to be grateful for!

I am also grateful for my friends and family- had to get that in there somewhere.

~Lauren

10 Registry Gifts That I Thought I Didn’t Need

Now that I have crossed the threshold, got hitched, and all the other metaphors for married; I reflected on what I wish I knew more about during the wedding process- the registry. I heard from a lot of people that a wedding registry is the only time in our lives that we can get everything new, so we better ask for new items that we already have now. First off, this is not true because Santa can also bring new things…second, I fully believed that what Zach and I had functioned perfectly fine. If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. I’ve heard my mom and other family members say that I needed a bunch of platters, gravy boats, and things I have never heard of for when we have people over. I’ve always replied back “you’re making it sound like I’m going to host a gathering every week, and even if I did, I don’t think I’ll be making gravy, and also, paper plates work just fine. Zach & I are very much minimalists, and like practicality.

As I was trying to piece together what we possibly would even need, I kept catching myself saying to Zach “this would be great for when we have people over!” I now understand why people have an obsession with HomeGoods and Target because they have a whole lot of things that would spruce up a house to make it more than a mismatched bag of my things marrying his things. There are pieces that make gatherings unique from others’ homes. So here is my list of everything I used to mock and say I didn’t need, but now I admittedly use, as well as the epiphanies I have learned along the way:

1. Adult Sheets, Towels, and Comforters

Adult is a key work here, let me explain. Yes, Zach and I have our own towels, sheets, and comforters from the pre married life; but the reason I started to see that these needed to be on the registry is because we both had different colors/quality/quantity. When I was sorting through our sheets and towels post single life, I picked up on the trend that there is such thing as “boy things” and “girl things,” aka Zach has blue towels, and a pair of sheets that probably had the color as “Poop Brown” on the label. The comforter was the classic navy blue with slight stains. My world was all pink or polka dots (no, that is not what I slept in before I married him.) I did not want to sleep on those old brown ones, and I am sure he didn’t want to slowly soak out the manhood in him. It pained my practical side to add gender neutral linens to the registry when all my mine had a lot of life left to live, but I am glad I took the step. I never understood why adult stuff was so dang expensive. Why get expensive sheets when you have the slight chance of sneezing resulting in dumping a cup of coffee on yourself while sitting in bed? (I never had coffee in bed again). I went against my practical mindset, I added the fancy sheets, towels, and a adulty comforter to the registry. The room absolutely transformed as well as my maturity level (I think). I had no idea that $200 sheets could feel like I am getting into bed only to feel like I transported to a 5 star hotel. Although, trying to get the fitted sheet became more difficult, unfortunately. I also didn’t know that adult towels were softer, & larger, since I have been using childhood sets (as a 5 ft. human, they have always been effective.) Don’t get me wrong, everything I owned pre-marriage life did its job (and I still use them from time to time so they don’t feel neglected,) but I now realize that our pre married linens didn’t look like we were united in marriage. I don’t know why matching towels is a symbol to me of being married, or having neutral sheet colors, but I now see the purpose of them because polka dots and my husband together just doesn’t look right. Maybe instead of doing a unity candle, we should have done a unity “sacrificial hand over our old linens ceremony.” Bottom line, your sheets and towels from the single life have served their purpose and can now retire to the “extra stuff closet.”

2. A Cake Dome

The first thing I told my mom once I created a registry was “please don’t get me a cake dome, I don’t need it.” Growing up, I remember my mom’s staple gift she got for someone was either a punch bowl, or a cake dome. Since punch bowls have gone out of style for every generation and have been replaced by fancy drink dispensers, you know, the ones where you put cucumbers or mint leaves in them? The cake dome continues to live on. The reason I thought I didn’t need one is for several reasons. 1. Anyone who knows me, knows that I probably can’t make a cake, even a boxed one, because I can’t even make pre-made tollhouse refrigerated dough cookies..practice does not make perfect in this case, I assure you. 2. Despite my inability to bake, I also have never bought a cake in my life. 3. Cakes look just fine in the container they came in- there’s no need to move it from it’s box home to a remodeled HGTV cake dome home. Well guess what? When moving into the new house, I found my thoughts telling me that would be a great place for a cake dome. It scared me, I didn’t know who I was turning into. Now, I am not about to be an infomercial telling you a cake dome changed my life, but I will tell you that I learned a cake dome is more than just a dome for cake. It can hold many other species of desserts such as cupcakes, donuts, cookies, pastries and so much more! It could even hold non food items if that’s what you’re in to. They can stand alone as a great decor piece which mine is currently, ready to hold all the desserts I will have for hosting people….there, I said it; Mom, you are right again.

3. House Decor

Have you noticed that recently the trend is to buy baskets, throw pillows, fake plants, cute bowls, or stylish serving trays that sit on coffee tables or counters? I told myself I would never get those kind of things or ask for them. But now, they are on my registry, because it hit me that I can actually USE those! A basket is made to hold things! Fancy coasters can save your tables from drinks! A fake plant can make it look like you can take care of plants when really you can’t! A bowl can contain items! A serving tray can be used to put things on as I bring them to all the gatherings I will host! I don’t know if it is just me who thought these things just sat there and looked pretty. A throw pillow doesn’t need to just sit there, it can be used for a nap (hence why 4th of July throw pillows are on our man cave sectional!) There’s been a lot of controversy on the topic of throw pillows. Husbands everywhere argue that there is such thing as too many, when in reality, I catch Zach cuddling up with all of them while watching his soccer games. The different size pillows caters to all your nap needs. Do I have more throw pillows than I always told myself I would? Yes, I have 2, and the ROI on them has been positive. Bottom line, if you are someone who gets these type of things, just remember their real purpose in life.

4. Manly Tools and Lawn Things

I call it lawn and manly stuff because I honestly don’t know the name of half of it or know how to use it. When we bought our house, I forgot that grass grows, leaves fall off the trees, weeds grow in colonies, and we now have a whole yard of grass and trees and weeds that do all that. The worst part is we have no Mike Casey to take care of that or make the grass green & pristine to the point where you can tell which yard is his when looking at an aerial view on Google Earth. Grass either grows, or it doesn’t, and post winter it looked unloved and sad at the Haugen House. Our grass would probably feel self conscious when people are over. Since buying our house, there have been a lot of times when we realized we needed something, but just didn’t have it. I learned that there are these things that are called stud finders, and if you don’t have one, you run the risk of your drywall ripping off when hanging a picture of an alpaca. I have learned that an electric drill is a necessity because a hammer just can’t do it sometimes. I learned that a wrench is handy when putting patio furniture together (there is a reason I leave this to Zach). We now have fertilizer and the thing that spreads it (put that on your registry). We have a lawn mower (add that), heavy duty shovels for snow (add that, and for all y’all that don’t see snow much, you probably will still need one). You will also need a lot of tools that I don’t even know the names of. I hope someone in your marriage does. And I reckon that you add a leaf blower on there too as we yearned for a leaf blower this past fall. Picking out every leaf in the rock beds, or sweeping crab apples off the driveway is time I will never get back.

5. Quality Master Bedroom Furniture

I used to call a Savers TV dinner tray my nightstand. It worked really well for the one thing I put on it being my phone half the time. Before, I thought, eh, I don’t even need a nightstand. I also thought I didn’t need more drawers other than a dresser because I had a closet. Well folks, once again I was wrong, as I remembered I have a husband that also owns shirts that he hangs in half the closet, but that left no room for his pants. Husbands need to wear pants, too, which require drawers. Speaking of drawers, they own those, too, that wouldn’t look great being displayed for everyone to see if there were no space to put them. Because of these new discoveries, we invested in great furniture that matched the vibe of the room – polka dot free. Quality furniture is no joke. We should have paid someone to haul our 230 lb dresser up the weird juxtaposition of stairs. Shoutout to Zach and my sister in law’s brother for getting that up there. Carter, you probably aren’t reading this, but we still owe you that drink. Zach and I hoisted up a lingerie chest that has been used more than I ever thought (don’t let your mind go to the gutter, it is a home to all of my workout clothes). I have started to learn that it is ok to have more space than I need, just in case I have more clothes than I need. Space is a luxury sometimes. Lastly, we carried up two nightstands, in which mine now has two things on it! Investing in quality furniture is so important because it lasts a very long time, which means, it won’t be coming back down those stairs for a very long time, I can assure you, and I dread that day.

6. A Copious Amount of Decent Sponges and Dish Cloths

It may feel extra putting a $15 sponge on your registry, but it is worth it. When I was living alone in my apartment, I had exactly one sponge, and two dish cloths. That’s all I needed! I have sympathy for all stationary objects like they are my children and I took great care of them so I wouldn’t need new ones. My sponges got baths in the dishwasher, and my dish cloths got a rinse after every time they were on the job. But then, I moved in with a man. I moved in with a man that was already pretty clean, but one that does not feel the same way as I do about my dish cloth children. This really changed the game and my anxiety as the food we made started to stick to pans more than the frozen chicken nuggets that I “cooked,” and my Scrub Daddy started to look more like a Scrub Daddy that got back from war. I now have a plethora of sponges and dish cloths to clean all the dried cream cheese off knives, and dish cloths to clean remnants of dinner off the counter tops- or blot the ketchup out of Zach’s white shirts which seems to happen to every Haugen (my Casey genes must protect me from that trait). Trust me on this ladies, load up on these things- you go through them fast if they can’t keep up.

7. A Quality Blanket

When looking at every person’s registries to gather research on what I should put on mine, there was always a blanket. I thought to myself why do I need a blanket to match the color scheme of my house when the neon green and purple zebra with the giant word “gymnast” works just fine? And I also had my Gustavus gold and black tie blanket that I made in high school -fully in tact. But then, I remember one night sitting on the couch before bed and the “this is the time to get new things” quote popped into my head. I scrolled and saw all the pretty and pricey blankets in pictures…then I looked down at my Gustavus colored blanket next to my furniture and realized it was time. It would look a lot more adultish, and matched the color of the handy dandy trendy basket it could go in! I am now sitting under an ombre fluffy weaved blanket and have no regrets. As great as the memories and sentimental moments my gymnast zebra blanket held that I don’t even remember which gymnastics meet I got it at, and probably your tie blanket with soccer balls, flowers, or basketballs on it- go for that upgrade.

8. Hutches

I don’t even know if that is the correct term for this, I am not quite the expert on furniture as I just learned what a console is. You know those cabinet things that do or don’t have glass doors but aren’t in the kitchen? No, not a china hutch, but similar. It is great to have a place to store miscellaneous things such as extra placemats, cloth napkins, and all the platters for hosting gatherings. Some things just don’t belong in the kitchen cabinets. Remember how I mentioned the extra space in the dresser? Yeah, these are needed because the items that would go in these would not go in the extra dresser space. Imagine someone coming over and needing a paper plate and you respond with “hold on, they’re next to my underwear in the bedroom!” Extra storage for extra pitchers, pieces to display, paper products, and items you don’t use frequently is super helpful! Maybe it truly is a china hutch for all the china you have but probably will never use. Maybe it is a little hutch for the books, and board games that you don’t want sitting in your living room because it would ruin the “vibe.” In my hutch, I have all my leftover Lyme Disease treatment products just in case I get bitten by a tick a third time by a llama instead of an alpaca this time. I have red solo cups from the housewarming party in which I thought would be more like a college party. Turns out, people do mature after graduation. I store a giant pitcher handed down in my family to me (because they probably never used it. Although, it is perfect for cucumber water after my mother in law handed out 3 pack cucumbers like party favors since she severely over shot the amount of cucumbers high schoolers would eat at a grad party- I digress- the cucumber water was great, Holly! I have seasonal themed bowls for the house to use when everything turns to pumpkin shaped in the fall, and most importantly, I have a Kentucky Derby themed salsa and chip platter to match the Kentucky Derby decorative basket which is needed for all things Derby Day.

9. Portable Casserole Dish Holder

Due to my half Kentucky roots, I call it a casserole. Sorry to all my purebred Minnesotans. I grew up seeing time and time again my parents put their casseroles for Thanksgiving in a holder with handles. They were the only ones in my extended family to do that, so I thought it was a little extra because casserole/hot dish pans have handles! Maybe it was due to the fact that my mom’s sweet potato casserole was coveted and needed to be protected at all costs, but in my head I just thought it would be fine throwing some tin foil on it and off you go! Then, I got old enough that I saw my name in the family rotation to bring something. I wrapped my dish in some towels to keep it warm for the road trip to family Thanksgiving. I was so excited to debut my finally edible dish. The trunk slowly opened to reveal half of my casserole sloshed everywhere while my parent’s casserole was perfectly fine in its little casserole tote. This moment led me to put that thing as one of the first items on the registry to preserve my hard work I put in for next Thanksgiving. Bet you didn’t think of putting that one on there, ladies!

10. Patio Furniture

I didn’t even add patio furniture to our registry because I truly did not see it as a necessity starting out. Granted, nothing on a registry is a necessity, if that were the case I’d make my registry my grocery list. I digress- patio furniture was in tier 3 for things we needed. For some reason, I believed that furniture on a patio, which patios and decks are made to house furniture was stupid to ask for. Zach was so adamant about getting patio furniture, even before a grill. Grills and patio furniture went hand in hand in my mind since growing up that is really the only time we went on our deck. The moment my perspective changed was when we had a bonfire and my choice was to pop a squat on the ground, or use the mini tripod looking chair that Zach got somewhere. Zach was a gentleman and gave me the mini chair while he found comfort on the ground. The other time was when it would have been so nice to have dinner outside, but that would mean dinner on the handy dandy TV dinner trays, or shall I say former nightstand, but we were sadly lacking chairs. That would be embarrassing and not functional for hosting in the future. The outside of a house needs to be furnished just as much as the inside. At least get a few chairs to start- it makes a huge difference. Now that we got our outside furniture, we’ve experienced birthday cake sessions, home cooked freezer meals together, and enjoying watching the rabbit we named Peter (real original) in the backyard together. I really wish I caved to putting it on the registry, so now is your chance!

I am a month into being a wife, which does not at all transfer to being an expert married person. But being closer to just getting married and all the trends may give me a leg up until years from now where the trends are TV dinner trays for all tables in the house along with wine glasses being used for vases. I tried to think of something weird, that was hard. If you noticed, hosting & gatherings happened came up in every paragraph-and that is what marriage and life is about; spending it with others and preparing yourself to do so. Maybe this won’t apply in the future if cake domes are out of style, power washing your dishes makes sponges go extinct, or Tesla makes a self mowing lawn mower- but for now as someone who read all the other blogs that were super cliche and didn’t tell me about having a copious amount of dish cloths, I hope this helps a little bit. Congratulations to those who are getting married, or if you’re just really into reading my blogs, or registry blogs; thank you! I wish you good luck with putting on the fitted sheets for the rest of your life!

~Lauren